December 20, 2013

Tis’ the season and I find myself without a romantic relationship. This must be a sign I am getting stronger since miraculously every holiday since my separation a man has been in my life to one degree or another. Two of them even were around just for the months of December and January. I now kindly refer to them as my Christmas presents. This must be a sign that I’ve grown, healed and am ready to go it alone! So why does a part of me say “this really sucks”.

The holiday commercials with all the lovers and happy married people make me want to gag. Seriously? Even when I was married and very much in love with my husband, those moments were rare. I see through the illusion and still it emphasizes my single-ness and irks me. Have you seen the “They’ve never been to Paris” commercial? (Throwing up in my mouth a little…) Thank Goddess I don’t watch TV very much. And yet they bombard me when I’m just trying to watch a little football! Geez! Can’t a girl just get her weekly dose of athletic violence with having her heart ripped out??

Of course, I exaggerate. It’s really not that bad and I am well aware and conscious of people in the world who are truly suffering. People who are far lonelier and have suffered much greater losses. And honestly, it nips at my heart…sometimes more than others. That’s just the truth.

So rather than count down the days till normalcy – aka Jan 2 – I’ve devised a primer of suggestion for singles to survive the holidays with fun and style. Even though I wrote these with ladies in mind, most are actually good for anyone out there. Read, enjoy, and share if you know someone who is feeling a little lonely and needs a lift to their holiday spirits!

To Make the Most of Your Single Holidays:

1. Go to every party you can and dance… whether others are dancing or not. “No” is an unacceptable answer to holiday invites. Get your boogie on!
2. Get manicures, pedicures and massages…touch is important when you’re feeling alone.
3. Make full use of mistletoe every chance you get. Kissing isn’t a crime and won’t give you a terminal illness.
4. Act as if…plan a romantic evening home alone with yourself. Holiday movie of choice, nice bottle of wine, roaring fire or cozy blanket with a decadent treat to eat. Have a date with your self!
5. Invite friends to join you for fun evenings out and tree/home decorating…no need to do it all alone.
6. Look for volunteer opportunities as wonderful ways to get out of your self AND meet new people…aka – potential date material. At least you’ll know they have a heart!
7. Make cynical comments whenever you want to. Better out than in with those negative feelings. Set them free on the ears of someone who will laugh with you.
8. Dress to the hilt every time you go out the door. Do it for yourself and to be ready in case a potential New Years date appears out of nowhere.
9. Make a plan for New Years. Don’t just wait for a good date to appear. Decide on something you really want to do and will look forward to whether with friends or on your own. Bonfire anyone??
10. Count your blessings. Being alone at the holidays is not the worst thing in the world. It just ‘kind of’ sucks. So think more about everything in your life that doesn’t.
11. Consider shaving something on your body in the shape of a candy cane (stripes and all) or a holly leaf. For men the possibilities are endless. Ladies, I think you know where I’m going with this.
12. Buy your self a romantic Christmas present. A new beautiful negligee or expensive lacy underwear? A coveted perfume? Go get it girl!
13. Enjoy your self no matter what. If your heart starts to feel hollow and sad, give it a minute, be kind to your self and then push on! Nobody wants a droopy face sourpuss at their holiday soiree. And that is not an excuse to not go either. Love your self, get out there, and make your holiday great!